How they're connected
They're not directly connected. Pairs like this are often drawn to each other precisely because of their differences.
What draws them together
Both are used to being the active one in a relationship: the Eight wants to protect, the Three wants to provide. The Eight denies themselves tender feelings; the Three numbs them with work. Both have plenty of personal strength but little experience with the power of emotional surrender.
That's why the breakthrough in the relationship often comes only when one of them fails. Threes discover that the Eight stays loyal to them even when their image collapses. The Eight is disarmed when the Three saves the day in a crisis.
Where they click
- A strong, successful couple.
- Both are decisive and action-oriented.
- On the same side, they're unstoppable.
The rest is in the Couples Guide. How to get it
Where the friction is
- A struggle for control and leadership.
- The Eight sees the Three as a chameleon, the Three sees the Eight as a tyrant.
- Both hate being held up by anyone.
The rest is in the Couples Guide. How to get it
Working together
The Three and the Eight share a typically "American" leadership style: aggressive, territorial, results over process. On the same side, they're an unbeatable team; on opposite sides, a power struggle is guaranteed. Usually the Eight leads and the Three is the best salesperson in the field.
The rest is in the Couples Guide. How to get it
The two of you, specifically
This is only a general description of the Three and Eight pairing. The Couples Guide goes deeper: you both take the Quick Test, and the guide works with your subtypes. The self-preservation, social, and one-to-one versions of the same strategy behave completely differently in a relationship.
- The full text on where you get stuck and how to get out
- Advice for each of you separately
- The two of you, specifically: your combination of subtypes
- How to understand your partner
- Tips for growing together
Strategist
Leader