Strategy 5
Capable Expert
- Desire
- Understanding and the ability to handle the world
- Fear
- Helplessness, incompetence, and overwhelm
Why People Confuse Them
This is a very rare mix-up, because they're almost opposites. More often, it's other people who mistake a Five for a Two. The Five forms only a few close bonds, and can then become quite dependent on those few people and not want to let them go.
What the Difference Is
The Two is emotionally open and people-focused. The Five is emotionally distant and more of a loner. Both easily feel rejected, but they handle it in opposite ways: the Two tries to win people over, the Five disconnects from the hurt and withdraws even further.
The Two is guided by feelings, and overly complex ideas and procedures tend to annoy them. The Five is annoyed by sentimentality and over-the-top displays of emotion, but feels right at home in complex ideas. The Two moves toward people, the Five away from them. When a Five seems clingy, it's only with a few of their closest people, not people in general.
Three Questions That Settle It
Answer honestly, based on how things usually are, not how you'd like them to be.
- When someone rejects you, what do you do?
2More likely a Two if you try to win them back or find love elsewhere.
5More likely a Five if you close up and keep more to yourself.
- What drains you more?
2More likely a Two if it's long abstract debates with no human dimension.
5More likely a Five if it's emotional outpourings and people who want a lot of closeness from you.
- How do you spend a free evening when you get to choose?
2More likely a Two if it's with people you love.
5More likely a Five if it's alone with a book, a project or your own thoughts.
Not sure? The test will tell you in 10 minutes. What's my strategy? →
How to Spot a Two →How to Spot a Five →How They Work Together in a Relationship →